Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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