so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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