guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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