just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
