Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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