Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
