...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize