I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Randomize
