roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
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