Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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