Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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