Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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