She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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