Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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