She went from zero to smokin in five shots
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
