i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
she smelled like a LAN party
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
