Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
