overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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