wanna go halves on a baby?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
