Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Bea Arthur died yesterday

  (240): View more from Maryland

  You shut your stupid mouth

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Betty White is next, I just know it.

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Bea Arthur died yesterday (240): You shut your stupid mouth (301): Betty White is next, I just know it. (240): Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next. http://tfl.nu/xn02
  Replies (21) Good night (1328) Bad night (743)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay http://tfl.nu/jcra
  Replies (18) Good night (701) Bad night (6160)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad http://tfl.nu/1udj
  Replies (13) Good night (1943) Bad night (5055)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn. http://tfl.nu/xmj5
  Replies (10) Good night (6387) Bad night (1459)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward http://tfl.nu/zi7g
  Replies (10) Good night (5961) Bad night (1428)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay http://tfl.nu/145k
  Replies (12) Good night (4215) Bad night (1285)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?

  (1-906): View more from Michigan

  It's okay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (906): Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay? (1-906): It's okay. http://tfl.nu/i6me
  Replies (9) Good night (1375) Bad night (4240)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit" http://tfl.nu/7x3l
  Replies (6) Good night (3307) Bad night (950)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it. http://tfl.nu/2u3k
  Replies (9) Good night (2944) Bad night (860)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string http://tfl.nu/a9dp
  Replies (9) Good night (1340) Bad night (826)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty http://tfl.nu/54ho
  Replies (11) Good night (901) Bad night (1526)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch? http://tfl.nu/qe37
  Replies (11) Good night (1747) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I can feel my moral fiber fraying.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): I can feel my moral fiber fraying. http://tfl.nu/8494
  Replies (2) Good night (1389) Bad night (649)
• Favorite

  (234): View more from Ohio

  For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (234): For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well. http://tfl.nu/1g4h
  Replies (4) Good night (514) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances http://tfl.nu/p8ta
  Replies (2) Good night (643) Bad night (430)

Randomize