The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh