I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
What did we do last night that was yellow?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Randomize