It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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