Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize