so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize