Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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