Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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