I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Text me some of your sweat
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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