wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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