I love black thongs
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
