Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize
