We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize