Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize