The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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