I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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