just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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