my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
