Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
