I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
