I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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