Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
