Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
