I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
