Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
