I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
