Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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