she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf