Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
