called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
