Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
