We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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