Pregnant stripper...not hot.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize